November 13th, 2012 by Jenn

The Pros and Cons of Cuddling

As a single lady, I’m regularly tormented by images of couples that I see at restaurants, on tv, in movies and going about my daily life. Their lives seem so idyllic and cozy and often times I find myself wishing I had someone to wander the farmer’s market with, or get dressed up for a fancy date night.

And then I remember that even when I was in a couple, I rarely did those things and it wasn’t always sunshine and unicorns. Couples get on each other’s nerves and they bicker and they have to constantly accomodate someone else’s schedule and preferences into their lives.

Regardless of my relationship status, though, one thing sticks with me from single girl times to girlfriend times, and that is an endless amount of opinions on cuddling.

(Is this just me? I fear I spend way too much time thinking about cuddling.)

The Pros of Cuddling

1. Cuddling is fun and adorable and who doesn’t like feeling close to someone? It’s super intimate and I believe that it signifies your feelings for that person if you’re willing to be that close to them all the time. I mean, how often do we complain about close talkers or people invading our personal space on the subway? And yet here we are, voluntarily getting closer and closer to another person. That takes affection.

2. Cuddling can be done anywhere. I personally don’t aspire to be an early morning bus cuddler or any type of public cuddler, but some do. Cuddling can be done fully clothed in public and you won’t get arrested! Unless you’re simultaneously cuddling and robbing someone…

3. Cuddling keeps you warm and probably lowers your heating bill in the winter. No arguments there.

4. Cuddling can also lead to other exciting activities that include nudity and therefore probably shouldn’t be done in public.

The Cons of Cuddling

1. My arm is asleep. Ouch ouch you’re on my hair. Your feet are freezing. Roll over. Guys, let’s face it – Hollywood makes cuddling look so easy and romantic but it rarely works out that way. Successful cuddling requires so many logistical strategies that I sometimes get so exasperated by trying to figure out how to stay comfortable that it loses all of its appeal and I give up. Stay off my side of the bed!

2. Cuddling can be done anywhere. Yes, this is a pro AND a con, because god forbid I want to eat my dinner in peace while some couple nuzzles together a la the Lady and the Tramp.

3. Cuddling keeps you warm and probably increases your air conditioning usage in the summer. But really – what is up with dudes who are giant radiators of heat? I can’t be the only one that seems to only date guys with outrageous body heat. This is likely a benefit in the winter but is the cause of much night time sweating during the summer.

4. Cuddling can be used as a weapon or cause for fighting. No matter how much I love a person and want to be close to them, sometimes I just want my own space. I want to sleep in the bed alone, or at least have my own half of the bed. It doesn’t mean I love the person any less, it just means that I want to be on my own for a small amount of time. If this isn’t communicated properly, it can misinterpreted as anger or lack of feelings, and cuddling goes from being super fun and nice to the cause of an argument.

I think I’ve realized I have far too many developed thoughts on this. Who else is with me? Please tell me I’m not the only one overthinking this!


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Jenn is a northern transplant currently living and dating in Atlanta, Georgia. She keeps herself entertained with weekly trivia nights, a kickball league, and cozying up to her DVR full of crime dramas. A blogger for over four years now, she’s not sure how she would communicate if she couldn’t share her life stories with strangers on the internet. For advice and words of wisdom in 140 characters or less, you can find her on twitter at @jenniferalaine and Google+.

One Response to “The Pros and Cons of Cuddling”

  1. November 15, 2012 at 9:47 pm, Cynthia (DatingAdvice.com) said:

    Haha, Jenn you had me chuckling at most of these points! The first Con, priceless.

    You’re right on a lot of things here. The last Con is what I anticipated this to be mostly about. There can be misinterpreted feelings when people cuddle “just because” or some other “quotable reason.”

    Unfortunately, mixed signals can be sent with even the slightest bit of PDA or under-the-sheets movements. It all LOOKS adorable but there’s too many hot and cold instances to merely jump in bed and hear your partner’s heartbeat….all night.

    Reply

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