How To End a Booty Call Relationship…

By: Rosie Valentine |

Setting up casual fun can be amazing if both people are on the same page: looking to play and have fun without getting attached. And if it goes well, it’s normal to want to make hookin’ up a regular gig.

But what about when he’s into it, but you’re not? What if you develop feelings that aren’t reciprocated? Either way, it gets really complicated and dramatic-which is what you were trying to avoid in the first place!

Here’s how to let a casual fling down easy, or communicate your true feelings.

If you’re not into it, but he still wants to hook up:

1. Stop the flirting, even via text. Ideally, you can just stop texting someone completely and ignore their calls. If you’re not ready to crush him by stopping contact all together, simply cool it down a little bit. Be friendly and cordial, but don’t go overboard. Don’t talk sex, don’t indicate you want to hook up again. If he’s not getting it, don’t be as responsive as you’ve been in the past and decrease the frequency and amount of texts.

2. Don’t see him. Yep, you have to go cold turkey. Look, it’s fun to pretend that you will suddenly become real friends, but we all know what happens when you meet a fling for a drink: one drink turns into five and five drinks turns into sex. Make it easy and avoid the awkward conversation and goodbye by not making plans in the first place. And if he asks why you’re not into hanging out again? Well…

3. Shoot straight, but be gentle. Be honest, but firm. Tell him that you just don’t think it’s the best situation for you right now. Since it’s not a relationship where communicating wants and needs is necessary, it’s okay to just say it’s not working out and leave it at that. Don’t engage too much conversation here–it is what it is, and that’s okay.

If you’re into it, but aren’t sure where to go:

1. Float the idea of hanging out sans sex. Ask if he wants to get together, and do something different. Grab dinner or happy hour but don’t let it go too far. See what it’s like to just hang out. Remember: just because you like someone in bed doesn’t mean the sparks will fly outside it! You might find that you have nothing to talk about outside of the bedroom or that your intense physical chemistry just doesn’t translate in the real world. Better to find out sooner rather than later, so you don’t get your hopes up for something more developing.

2. Cut things off—but tell him why. Shoot straight: tell him that you’re developing feelings for him beyond the casual relationship and you know that’s not what he’s interested in. Tell him that you would love to give something more serious a try if he’d like that, but if not, cut off contact completely. You need to take care of your feelings first, and be smart about them. Why put yourself in a situation that might end up hurting you a lot in the long run? Don’t wait around for him to realize what a catch you are…chances are it has nothing to do with you at all, he’s just not interested in anything serious right now, and that is totally okay.

3. Stick to your guns! It’s not fair to you (or to him) if you’re developing feelings and know they’re not reciprocated yet you continue to have sex with him. Make sure you make a truly clean break without backsliding. While it can be tempting to want to have sex “one more time” in the long run, it’s easiest not to. This is where you have to think long-term-what feels good right now, might not feel so great in a week when you are falling in love and he won’t return your phone calls.

How would you end a booty call relationship?

Looking for dates in Guernsey? Double your chances and give Date Guernsey Singles a try for free today.

Save