How to zhuzh up your bedroom this Valentine’s Day

By: Lottie Williams |

Online Dating

Aaah Valentine’s Day, the pink fluttery harbinger of pheromones where romance is in the air, Ed Sheeran is clearing his throat and grand gestures are flung around like pop-up ads – flowers, chocolates, promises you don’t intend to keep. Ain’t love grand! Regardless of what you think about Valentine’s Day, or what you think your partner thinks of it – a joyous day celebrating love, a nauseating cash grab or a night of singleton vilification – if there is the possibility of spending this day with someone, err on the side of caution and go all in. After all, no one is ever going to get mad at you for doing something on Valentine’s Day, but ignore it at your own risk…

Whether you’re trying to attract a new mate or trying to convince your spouse that this marriage thing really was a good idea, if all goes well, then the day’s final destination is of course… the bedroom. Now, you might be a bit of a slob or, between work and life pressures, your bedroom has now just become a functional space for you to dump your exhausted body and piles of laundry you’ve no will to fold. But if ever there was an excuse to make a bit of effort, surely it’s the day of mandatory intimacy. And even if you are going to celebrate Valentine’s alone – treat yourself!

Breathing some new life into your bedroom needn’t be a chore, so here are a few simple tips to transform your chamber from a hapless den of depression to a seductive boudoir of frisky possibilities. 

Not surprisingly, let’s start with the bed. Hopefully, you’ve got a comfy mattress, but if it’s lost its springiness of late, this can be a good excuse to invest in a new one. This ought to be a no brainer, but lay fresh sheets before you leave for your date – the devil’s in the details and if you’re having the most special of guests over, they will definitely appreciate diving into crisp linens with a hint of fabric softener, rather than a mangled wad of sweat, dog hair and lord knows what else.

On the topic of smells, it’s a good idea to air your room out. Winter is hardly the time of year when windows get opened often, what with the wind, rain and general grey murkiness of it all, but the air in a room can become very stagnant, and if it’s further assisted by the aroma of pungent socks, pets or old takeaway boxes, even 15 minutes of fresh air will work wonders. At the very least, give it a once-over with febreeze or a scented candle – smell is a very powerful memory trigger so do you want your partner to associate you with fresh flowers and spicy fruit or the waft of a dripping bin liner? 

If your room is somewhat messy or cluttered and you don’t have the time, or compulsion, to deal with it properly, then ottoman beds are your best friends. We learned in childhood that the fastest way to tidy a bedroom is to shove everything under your bed – and grown-ups have perfected this strategy by inventing storage beds. The principle is the same, but with no visual evidence and less dust to deal with. 

Candles are, of course, super romantic, but unless you’ve got a roommate that will help set up your bedroom while you’re out with your date, it’s tough to make it part of the setting in advance without risking house fires. LED fairy lights are the way to go – even if you think they’re childish or overly feminine, you’re trying to dupe this person into loving you for a while, so go that extra sparkly mile and remember – the magic can’t die if it was never there in the first place. Put your back into the ambience and spend some money on different kinds of battery-operated devices this Valentine’s Day. 

Now let’s talk about… the drawer. Yes, that drawer. You know which drawer we mean. The gatekeeper of your pleasure and shame. Unless you’ve got some ninja moves or trust that your boo won’t sneak a peek while you’re asleep or in the bathroom, we strongly recommend sorting this drawer out before you invite company over. You want your partner to believe this night is all about them, so don’t give them a complex about their bodies and stash your special “romance magazines” someplace else. As for everything else in there, it’s really a judgement call.

If you’ve been with your special someone for a while and they know and enjoy all your dirty secrets, then it’s good to have them handy. But if you’re still in the early days or worse still, this is the first romantic encounter, you might want to avoid putting anything you’ve used with a previous partner on display and if there’s anything particularly …adventurous in there, it’s probably best to ease your new lover into your more special appetites, and not have it casually waiting in the wings – not yet anyway. Stick to the essentials and hide anything too risqué under your bed! As a bare minimum, tidy it up! If you’re going to be exploring the most intimate of intimates, hygiene is important, so make sure everything is clean and dusted. They can learn to find your messiness charming after you’ve rocked their world.

On the topic of cleanliness, and I’m mainly talking to the guys out there, give your bathroom a quick clean. Nothing kills romance faster than a hairy sink or mouldy towels! 

So, ready the roses, fluff up those pillows and happy hunting!