First dates are a bitch, aren’t they? Exciting and nerve racking all at the same time. I have been on many and have learned some interesting, if not valuable lessons on what guys should NOT do on a first date. I also enlisted the help of 2 of my male friends to get the guys perspective, because ladies we aren’t perfect either.
Gentleman-
Don’t Drink Too Much.
Even if you’re nervous because she’s really hot, smart and you facebook stalk her daily–just don’t. I’m not sure how to expand on this one except to say, sloppy isn’t a good look on anyone. In addition, don’t get drunk and then get behind the wheel. I guarantee she will never speak to you again.
Do Not Stare At My Chest. Or my lips. Or my ass.
Guys take note-“You have amazing boobs” is not appropriate first date dinner conversation. Also? Stop staring at them. You just made things awkward, congrats buddy. I know I have an amazing rack, and she probably knows she does to. There is no need to completely creep her out so soon.
Do Not Take Me Out When You Are Having The Worst Day Ever.
I once went on a first date with this guy who mentioned that his aunt was very ill a few days before our date. I asked if he wanted to reschedule, and he assured me no, that she should be fine. Saturday rolls around, and it’s date night. I met him at the restaurant–thank you, Universe–and when I got there he.was.crying. On the phone with his mother, talking about his aunt, who had passed away earlier that day. Now, please don’t misunderstand. I felt absolutely horrible that he was going through such a thing, however–I barely knew the dude and would have completely understood if he called to reschedule. It was beyond awkward–after a drink, I ended up telling him he should go home because he.was.still.crying, and I never went out with him again. Cold? Maybe, but it showed poor judgement on his part.
Ladies-
Do Not Text or Check Your Phone Repeatedly.
I’ve been majorly guilty of this one. I actually got called out on it by a guy I was seeing after he took me to an NHL game. We are all so connected right now-Twitter, Facebook, Instant Messaging, Foursquare, etc all in the palms of our hands. In my mind, I was just sharing with almost 1,000 people my first real hockey game experience. To him? I was ignoring him and paying attention to the virtual world more than him and being completely rude. I felt like a total asshole, and luckily he forgave me. My phone is now on silent and in my bag during dates. This guy likes you, and wants to get to know you. Disconnect, and engage with him. Love, learned it the hard way.
Do Not ‘Not’ Offer To Pay.
Key word ladies…OFFER. As my good friend L.A Idiot says, “Yes, offer. But a good guy will never let a girl pay.” I’m as old fashioned as they come, and have never paid on a first date. This doesn’t mean I didn’t reach into my bag and grab my wallet while offering to pay. Of course I did. He should shut you down immediately, but it’s just rude not to offer. Also, don’t forget the two most important words (in this case)-THANK YOU. Say thank you. Immediately and sincerely. Manners are hot, entitlement is not.
Don’t Put Out.
As another male friend said, “If you do, you’re a hoe in my book and it’s on to the next.” I know, I know I’ve been there. Amazing first date! You don’t want it to end!! You feel like you’ve known this person forever! The chemistry is crazy! You don’t “usually” do this! According to both my guy friends, sex on the first date is the worst thing you could do. It’s not brain science. If you want to be treated like a lady-act like one. Make him work for it, and keep him coming back for more.
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