Kissing on the First Date – Yes or No?

By: Jenn |

Do you kiss on the first date?

Kind of a blunt question, but an important one to think about! For me, the answer is sometimes. Sometimes, if I’m feeling particularly excited and flirty about the guy I’m with, or we had a really great time, or we’ve been friends for a while and this is the first step towards a different kind of relationship for us.

But by default? No, I don’t kiss on the first date and I don’t think it should be expected.

For many of who are online dating, the first date is the first time we’ve ever heard someone’s voice and seen them in person. A minute before your date showed up, he or she was still a stranger. A stranger who you had read about online and emailed back and forth with, maybe, but still more of a stranger than an acquaintance. I usually don’t kiss strangers a few hours after meeting them, so why does labeling this encounter a date change that?

A first date with someone you meet online is almost like a half-date. That first meeting is usually casual and the purpose is to get to know the other person when neither of you are hiding behind a computer screen. Very rarely have any of my first online dates been a romantic or intimate affair. I don’t usually fall head over heels for someone, or even get butterflies in my stomach within hours of knowing them. And I usually don’t want to kiss people I don’t get butterflies for, right?

(Of course, all of these rules and preferences go out the window when it comes to someone I  really like.)

When it comes down to it and I examine my dates over the past year or so, I was very rarely disappointed when there was no first date kiss and very often put off when there was.

How do you guys feel about the First Date Kiss? Is it always a green light? Always a red light? What are your paramets?