I know. If you’ve come from my blog, I’m sure a lot of you are thinking, “Improve my love life with blind dates…not so much, Liz.” I hear you-Blind dates are nerve-racking, potentially time wasting and consuming and basically, a crap shoot. What does that even mean? Who cares. HOWEVER, I’ve been on my fair share of blind dates this summer and here are 4 ways my love life, and life in general has improved because I’ve taken a chance. My horizons have been broadened and if I do say so myself, I am quite the conversationalist these days…

1. I can now talk to ANYONE, about ANYTHING, ANYTIME.
I’m fairly shy, (Well, until you get to know me and then I won’t shut the hell up) and I never bothered to master the art of “small talk” or “chit chat.” I’m BUSY. Since I’ve been doing all this blind dating, I am now the master of small talk. This doesn’t just mean that I can carry on a conversation with my date (What do you do, hobbies, family, stab me in the face), but it means that I’m way more comfortable talking to men I see out and about. Cute guy at Starbucks? Now I’m not too shy to ask him what his poison is. OH yeah…I totally used that line in Starbucks the other day. It worked.

2. You Stop Caring.
In a good way. So you’ve built up this person you’re going on a date with in your head to be the end all be all man of your dreams. You get there…and for whatever reason, he’s just not. Or the chemistry just isn’t there. As you keep dating, you begin to realize there will always be another date, another guy, another chance…so sit through it, drink your wine, be friendly and ON TO THE NEXT.

3. You Surprise Yourself.
By definition, going on a blind date is somewhat of a risk. Is this guy going to be all his online dating profile cracked him up to be? Or maybe, if you’re being set up by friends, what if they are completely wrong and you guys have zero in common? What if, what if! Hold up, Negative Nancy, because I’ve had some amazing blind dates. The best ones are usually the ones I think will go absolutely nowhere-the ones I have to text my friends or ask my sister, “should I go out with so and so tonight because I don’t feel like doing my hair, it’ll probably just be a waste of time anyway!” And of course they tell me to get my ass off the couch and GO…because you never know.

4. You Are Open To Love-Which Attracts Love.
I’m a firm believer that while things happen when you aren’t looking for them, you also can’t be completely shut off to the possibilities of love-THAT won’t work either. Plus, you get boring and stop doing your hair and start watching too much Law and Order. TRUST ME ON THAT ONE. Accepting blind dates, online dating or being set up by friends keeps you out there, gets you excited, and while not every date you go on is going to end in butterflies, it only takes one.

It only takes one.

How I Improved My Love Life With Blind Dates! (Really) is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

Image credit: Flickr

4 Hot Date Ideas For When You Meet Face To Face! is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

This weekend though, I was a certified man-eater. Lessons learned…

1. If you have a baby, do not bring your baby on a first date. We are all adults, and some adults have children. No problem! I love kids. However, should you find yourself with custody of your 13 month old teething son over the weekend, this might not be the best time to go on a date. Even more importantly-TELL your date in advance that you are bringing your child. That way she (I) won’t be shell shocked when he is throwing plates at the waitress and terrified seeing her future flash before her eyes. It was a NIGHTMARE. My date was embarrassed, the poor baby just could not be consoled, and I could not relax.

2. FAKE IT. I had a first date with someone I had been talking to for awhile and the chemistry just wasn’t there. Sucks, but it happens. Again, we’re adults.  It wasn’t horrible, but we both knew we weren’t going to be getting naked later or ever, but we can have decent conversation and be relatively friendly, can’t we? I can. He couldn’t.

3. Take a risk. This one guy had been asking me out for awhile, and for some reason I kept denying him. I have no idea why, as he’s the most amazing guy ever. One night my plans fell through but I was all dressed up and ready to go…so I asked him out. We ended up meeting for wine, lots of wine, sparks flew, and we have been dating ever since.

4. Do not drunk tweet. I learned this lesson the hard way. I was not intending to be such a naughty little minx this weekend, and my friends were, rightfully so, surprised to wake up and read of my escapades via twitter.  This resulted in quite a few “WHAT IS GOING ON?” phone calls/texts/emails.   New life rule-after 2 drinks, put the social media away. You’re welcome.

Overall, I had fun, and I learned that sometimes saying yes is worth it. I’m taking this weekend off dating though, I need a break…probably. We’ll see.

Lessons Learned and Deal Breakers is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

Profile Mistake #1: Listing Things About Yourself Without Any Detail

Hey, not everyone is a professional writer, so if you’re guilty of listing things in your profile it’s understandable. But if you change this one thing today, you are more likely to attract someone to you tomorrow. Here’s an example of the mistake most online daters make, along with the fix:

Mistake: “I’d like to go to France one day, and love to travel.”

When you read this, do you get a sense of this dater’s personality? Not really. They like to travel and want to go to France. How about this instead:

Fix: “Architecture and culture intrigue me. That’s why I’d like to visit Paris one day. What could be better than walking along the same streets Napoleon, Hemmingway, and Colette all strolled down as well?”

Do you see how, in the “fix” there is more detail? You understand why this person wants to go to France, and the result is that they are instantly more attractive because they shared some details.

Profile Mistake #2: What Your Friends Say

Never tell other online daters that your friends think you’re cool, that you should be married already, or that you are “trustworthy.” Not only do these descriptions mean absolutely zero in the online dating world, you might just bore someone to the point where they drop your profile and move on to the next.

Profile Mistake #3: Using Relationship Language Instead of Date Language

The whole purpose of online dating is to meet someone special and start a relationship. But there are some key steps in between there, and the main one is dating. Remember dating?

You don’t want to scare someone off in your profile by using language you would use to describe a relationship. Here are some words that great in relationships, but should be avoided in an online profile. Haul these out when your online date gets to know you better:

• back rubs
• lingerie
• high heels
• sex
• sensual

Profile Mistake #4: An Online Dating Profile That Is Too Long

You want to give someone an idea of your personality, not make them read a War and Peace sized novel. Keep your essay to a few short paragraphs so they will be intrigued enough to want to find out more.

Profile Mistake #5: Not Asking for the Close

Never just wander off at the end of your profile. Start strong and finish strong. At the end of your profile, ask for the date. Something as simple as “Why not send me an email to get the conversation going” should do the trick.

5 Biggest Online Dating Profile Mistakes is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

5 Ways To Bridge The Gap From Online To OFF.
1. Leave your expectations at the door. Life is absolutely ridiculous. The second I think I have it all figured out, it throws me for a loop.  You met someone cool online.  Just enjoy the moment without planning the honeymoon and naming your babies.

2. Recognize that the other person is an actual, real human being-not just a picture and words on a screen.  He has faults, bad days, and you might not see eye to eye on everything.  Look for the good in him.  Except if he pees in your bed, then kick him the hell out.

3. Don’t lose yourself. All those interests and activities and passions you wrote on your dating profile?  KEEP THEM.  Not only did they attract him/her in the first place, but allowing your life to revolve around your significant other is not healthy and nobody likes a stage 5 clinger. Keep your friends, do your thing, whatever it may be. Include him in your life, but never make him your life.

4. Don’t get caught up in Facebook drama. I can’t believe how seemingly rational adults turn into obsessed 13 year olds because of Facebook.  I’ve seen relationships ruined because someone wrote on another persons wall, or hasn’t updated their relationship status yet.  One of my friends gets mad at her super sweet boyfriend because he never writes on her wall.  I don’t get it…he’s in the same room as her, making her dinner, talking about her day…and she’s upset about Facebook!  Stop trying to prove something to your social network, and if you really have something important to say to your significant other, may I recommend saying it to his/her face?

5. Go with the flow, follow your instincts and listen to your heart. The only people who know what’s really going on in a relationship are the two people in that relationship, so turn the outside noise off.  Too fast, too slow, who the hell cares what people think?! Do what works for the both of you.  Key word however-BOTH.

5 Ways To Bridge The Gap From Online To Off is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

Compliment Her Eyes or Smile

Many guys notice a girl’s features, like the color of her eyes or her beautiful smile, and it’s a natural progression to compliment her on these things. But complimenting any other body part? A big no-no. Even if a girl has, say, nice legs, a guy is wise to limit his comments. After all, flirting is done to try and get a girl to go out with you, and you only have a limited chance to pull it off.

Of course, if you don’t notice a girl’s eyes or smile, then don’t mention it. Never give out false compliments just to get a girl to go out with you. Girls can tell when you’re sincere.

Avoid Being Too Sexual

Flirting is what you do before you are in a relationship. So limit the sexually suggestive talk to one of your dates. Never approach a girl with a sexually-charged vibe because she is sure to walk away.

Comment on Something Going on Around You

Flirting begins sometimes with simple conversation. Start out by commenting on things that are happening in front of you. Are you waiting in line? Comment on someone that’s taking a long time, the menu items, the weather, or give the girl a compliment to open up a conversation.

Smile

Flirting works best when you smile. You might be nervous, but make sure to show those purly whites. The old adage that it’s not what you say but how you say it is definitely true in the dating world.

Ask Her Out!

Have an idea for a date in mind before you even begin to flirt. It should be something simple that she will have a hard time refusing. Things like a coffee date or grabbing some lunch are good suggestions. Ask her out for an activity that will be short rather than inviting her to dinner right away. That way you both will be able to get to know each other a little better, and you’ll have an idea of whether you want to have a real first date.

Flirt Confidently!

The best way to get confidence when it comes to talking with a girl? Practice. Talk to girls you like and those you don’t. Learn how to easily talk to women so when you see that girl that knocks you out, you’re ready to flirt!

How to Flirt With a Girl is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

Here are some online dating success tips especially for the guys.

Watch the Age Range You’re Searching For

Guys sometimes forget that with online dating, potential dates are trying to learn everything about you from their profile. It stands to reason, since the girls haven’t met you yet. So be cautious as to what you say and even what you’re searching for. If you search for an age range that is, say, inappropriate, it will be an instant turn off to women and they’ll move on to another profile.

What’s inappropriate? Generally, searching for someone too young. For example, if you’re 50 and searching for someone “18-50″ years old, you might be thinking that if the girl is 18 she’s legal and you’re cool to date her. Potential dates, however, are looking at that range and wondering why you’d honestly want to date an 18-year old. You may think it’s none of their business, but the reality is you’re driving away dates this way. So do a reality check on your search criteria and tweak it until you get better results.

What Kind of Physical Qualities Are You Looking For?

Every guy has an idea of the perfect mate, but is it realistic? Are there women who would actually fit your criteria and want to date you? If so, then go for it. If you’re unsure, then change the information you have about who you’re looking for. Open up your search criteria so you can meet a real woman and not the kind that exist only in your fantasies or in magazines.

Give Your Essay Some Personality

Take your time in crafting your online dating essay. Make sure you’re giving examples of things you like to do, instead of just listing them off like a resume. Also, watch the language you use. Sometimes men have a habit of writing an essay geared toward the woman they want to be in a relationship with. They talk about romantic dinners and back rubs, which may be just slightly too aggressive for the women online.

Rather than that, write about the first couple of dates the two of you might go on. This will make women feel more secure and as a result you’ll get a better response to your online ad.

Online Dating Tips for Guys is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

1. “Ur Hottt”
I never know what the correct response (if any) to this is. Um, thank you. Or should I say Thank uuuu?

2. “Why is someone like you on this website?”
Someone LIKE ME? What does that even mean?!  I understand that they usually mean this complimentary, but it sounds a tad rude.  This is usually followed up by “Why are you single?” which is a perfectly valid, if not loaded, question for the right time…aka not your first round of communication.

3. “Call me 234-567-8910″
I fully support taking things to the next level, and then the next level and so on and so forth, however why on earth would I call you if you haven’t even bothered to send me a complete sentence?! I’m busy, we all are-make me want to talk to you. This also shows me that you probably give your phone number out to just about every vagina on the site. Not attractive.

4. “You remind me of my ex”
Awesome!  This tells me one of two things. 1. You’re still hung up on your ex, in which case PASS. Also, pass the wine. 2. I remind you of a relationship that for whatever reason went south, and the very first thing you thought to say was that I reminded you of a break up? Pass the Jack Daniels.

5. “Wanna come over tonight?”
No, actually, but to each their own! If that’s the kind of thing you’re looking for, go for it-just please let a friend know the address of where you’re headed. Me? Not so much. If I have a free night, I would like to spend it ON A DATE. Or out with my friends. Or on the couch watching Gossip Girl and emailing guys who are at least attempting to get to know me.

You don’t have to write an epic romance novel (actually don’t, that’s amazingly creepy), but put some genuine effort into it!  And keep it classy.

Elizabeth Marie is a Cali girl who left half her heart in London. She spends her time blogging, traveling, drinking copious amounts of wine and is on an eternal quest for the perfect fitting jeans and the perfect fitting man, both of which are hard to find, but she just won’t settle. Subscribe to her blog or follow her on Twitter.

5 Things You Should NOT Say In The First Email is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

Post a Recent Profile Picture That Reflects Your Personality

You might love that picture from a few years ago where you were a bit thinner, tanned, and had a great hair day. But if it’s not who you are right now, then use a more recent one instead. Choose one main shot that shows you from the shoulders up, looking at the camera with a nice smile. No business photos or anything of you wearing something too revealing.

Then, add three or four additional photos that show you doing things you enjoy. Let the pictures reflect your personality and lifestyle. If you love horseback riding, include a picture of you doing that. If you spend every Sunday at a flea market, take a camera and add a shot of you haggling over price. It’s okay to “stage” a few photos because the more relevant pictures you have the easier time a guy will have in figuring out your personality.

Look for Personality Instead of Physical Qualities When Trying to Find a Guy Online

Many girls complain that there are no good guys in the world left to date, yet they overlook potential matches online because of certain qualities like income or height. Look at it this way, girls, if an absolutely perfect, wonderful guy was available, and he was exactly your height, wouldn’t you at least want to meet him?

Or, if a guy was responsible, funny, charming, and treated you well, but made less than your “ideal salary,” wouldn’t you at least want to share a cup of coffee and see if he was worth a second date? By limiting search criteria to find what you perceive is the perfect guy on paper, you might just be excluding some wonderful real-life guys! So open up the search criteria, and let it be a guide rather than the last word. If you’re curious at all about whether a guy might be right for you, at least meet him for coffee.

Email Him First

Rather than winking and hoping he responds to you with an email, go ahead and send him one first! Tell him you enjoyed his profile and feel that you have some things in common. Invite him out to meet you for coffee for an hour. One hour can change your life.

Online Dating Tips for Girls is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!

Here are a few of the worst types of online daters, so you know to stay away from them.

People Who Are Weird

Okay, the word “weird” is relative, because we all have something about us that can be considered odd. But there are certain people who celebrate their weirdness, and that can be a red flag. Normally, people want to find common ground. Daters, especially, will list things like movies and going out to eat in their profiles, because other people tend to like those things, too. This is smart because before you can find someone to appreciate the fact that you collect miniature hippos or playing in an air band or have a vacuum cleaner collection, you’ve got to get them to at least get to know you. After that, you can haul out your “weird” stuff because by then the person can put it all in perspective.

The weird ones, on the other hand, will purposely challenge someone to contact them by listing several hobbies or traits that no one in their right mind would be caught doing. This can seem almost combative, and it is.

People Who Want to Get Married Tomorrow

Everyone wants to find someone special. But people who want to find someone now, today, no matter who they are, aren’t looking for the right person. Instead, they just want to find a body. The problem with this is these folks won’t get to know you for who you really are, which will lead to problems down the road. If someone is in a rush to get married, be cautious and make sure they are really interested in you, not just in matrimony.

People Who Have a Negative Attitude About the Opposite Sex

We all have sad dating stories we can tell, but there are a few people who use their profile as a way to complain about the opposite sex. Guys might say, “women say they want a nice guy, but…” or women may write, “I really don’t believe there are any nice guys left….”

Perhaps they will mistrust the online dating system, and use their profile to complain about that. If you read something like, “I don’t really need to do this, but…” or “I’m not sure this whole thing really works, but I guess I’ll give it a try….” use caution. Getting them to open up and get to know you in a meaningful way may be a challenge.

The good news? Despite the types of people listed above, there are far more people ready for a mature relationship. They want to find someone special, and will take the time to do it. There are many more of these goodhearted types of people online, so make sure you say hello when you spot them.

Worst Types of Online Daters is a post from: WeLoveDates Online Dating Blog – Signup for free UK Online Dating & Adult Dating!