July 5th, 2012 by Simone Paget

When Should You Change Your Facebook Status?

When dating and social media collide, it seems like is almost always inevitable. I can’t tell you how many times I have been out with friends over the past few years and heard stories that start like this:

“We’ve been dating for a month but his Facebook profile still says he’s single”


“She broke up with me by changing her status from In a Relationship to Single”

Another friend found out that she’d been dumped when she went to go leave a message on her (now) ex- boyfriend’s wall and noticed that he’d blocked her completely.

Making your relationship “Facebook Official” seems to be the modern version of “Going Steady.” Deciding when to make things official online seems to be a really big deal these days (maybe too big a deal.) The question is, when you’re dating someone when should you change your Facebook status from “Single” to “In a Relationship”?

If you’re looking to minimize drama and not annoy the people on your friends list with constant changes to your relationship status, my suggestion would be to wait to change your FB status until you at least know the status of your relationship offline. Unless you want people to read your timeline and think this:

“Oh my god, she’s in a relationship! Oh wait, they just broke up. Now they are back together?! What the…?!”

Personally, I would prefer to wait to change my relationship status until I know the relationship is exclusive, however long that takes.

I’ve never paid much attention to people’s FB relationship statuses, however if it’s important to you it might warrant a straightforward conversation with the person you’re dating. An open conversation might reveal that maybe (like me) they’re the kind of person who maybe doesn’t spend much time thinking about these things and that there wasn’t an issue to begin with.

Or, you could do what I do: bypass all the drama and just don’t include your status at all in your profile. I just find excluding my status all together makes things so much easier and keeps the things I want to keep private, private. If the next person I date has an issue with the fact that I don’t feel comfortable sharing my relationship status with the world of Facebook then maybe they just aren’t the right person for me.

When do you think it’s appropriate to change your Facebook status? 

Simone is a freelance writer and author of the sexy and irreverent blog Skinny Dip. When she’s not writing her heart out about everything to do with love, sex and relationships, she loves wandering her city with a large cup of coffee in hand, in search of the next great story. You can visit her blog, follow her on twitter or catch up with her on Facebook. Skinny Dip

3 Responses to “When Should You Change Your Facebook Status?”

  1. July 05, 2012 at 12:13 pm, my honest answer said:

    Yeah, I totally agree – just don’t update your status!

    I haven’t filled mine in either. When I was just dating my now husband, I thought it kind of tempted fate. All the people who needed to know we were together knew, because when facebook got big we’d already been together for a few years. When we got engaged, it just seemed smug to change my status to that. And now we’re married, so, well, I don’t really need to advertise my availability or lack thereof, do I?

    But I guess that theory only works if you never change it from the beginning. If you do keep your profile really up to date, and have changed it from in a relationship to single and back in the past, it might look odd if you didn’t.

    But as you say, some things are just private! (If only people posting all kinds of things on facebook could appreciate that!).

    • July 10, 2012 at 7:43 pm, Bella said:

      I completely agree with this method!! The people who know, KNOW :)

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