“Why are you single?” is easily one of the most hated questions in the world. Most of us can’t imagine why there isn’t a line out the door of eligible bachelors or bachelorettes who want to put a ring on it and take us off the market permanently. This question immediately places us on the defensive, because we’ve come to relate “single” with a four letter word. If you’re honest with yourself though, there must be a few reasons why you’re currently unattached-no apologies necessary.
Just in case you can’t think of any, here are the top five reasons why you’re single.
1. You’re stuck in a pattern. If you date the same kind of people over and over again, you’re going to end up with the same results. Stepping out of your dating comfort zone can be scary, but change by definition should be uncomfortable at first. If you don’t want the same old thing, stop doing the same old things!
2. You don’t put yourself out there. Wouldn’t it be nice if our soul mate could just stop by our house one day and we could fall in love without putting forth any effort at all? Nothing in life works that way. If you want to find love, you’ve got to open the door. Go out with your friends, find hobbies you enjoy or try online dating. Meet love in the middle.
3. You’re too low maintenance. You don’t need to be a supermodel with the most stylish new clothes ever, but you do need to project to the world that you care about yourself. There is nothing more unattractive than someone who doesn’t take care of themselves, and you’ll be amazed at how far smelling good and doing your hair will take you in the world of dating.
4. You have ridiculous standards. Standards are a beautiful thing. Before you begin dating, you should have a defined list of your dating standards. What do you truly need from a partner to be happy? What are the things you refuse to bend on? Some people take the concept of standards way too far though. If you limit yourself to only dating guys who are 6’2 and make $100,000 a year, you’re cutting yourself off from a ton of great guys who might not be as tall or make as much money, but may treat you the way you deserve. Standards are there to protect you, not limit you.
5. You aren’t ready for love. Even though you say you are, you might not be ready to fall in love. Sometimes our subconscious holds us back without us even knowing it. Are you still hurt from a past break-up, or have a lot of fears or insecurities about love? Sometimes even though we want to be in love one day, we just aren’t ready for it today. Facing our demons and figuring out the status of our hearts before diving into the dating game can do us a lot of good and save us a lot of time. It’s OK to not be ready for love right now…it will still be there when you are.
If you’re single, do you know why?