Dating & Relationship Blog

June 18th, 2014 by Almie Rose

3 Things You Need To Stop Doing On Tinder (And Online Dating Sites In General)

Tinder

The Tinder dating app is a bit of a hot mess, but it can be less of a hot mess if we change some things we do in our online profiles and interaction. Here are 3 things you need to stop doing on Tinder — and on online dating sites in general, as these tips can work for pretty much any online dating site. Remember people: we’re all in this together.

1. Using bad photos. So what is a bad photo, then? There are lots of different bad photos, and I find that guys are worse at choosing good photos then women are. A bad photo is:

– A photo in which we can’t see your face, because it’s either in shadow, is covered with a camera or other object (like sunglasses), or you’re just plain hiding it. Don’t hide your face, that’s the quickest way to a Tinder “Nope”.

– For guys: a bad photo is a shirtless selfie. I know you think that showing off your gym bod is a sure way to our hearts, but it actually comes off as a little creepy and a lot of desperate.

– You posing with lots of people — how are we supposed to tell which one you are? Some people aren’t going to have the patience to go through all your photos to figure it out. The worst is when EVERY PHOTO is a group photo. The only photos on your profile should be photos of just you. Make it simple.

– A headshot, because it’s cheesy and also everyone can look good with perfect lighting and retouching. It’s not a real depiction of who you are.

– An overly filtered photo, where it looks like Tumblr exploded all over your face. Filters are okay, just don’t get it to the point where you’re airbrushing yourself.

2. Using Tinder (or any online dating profile) to promote your band/stand-up/DJ set/anything.

I’ve seen people swap their main profile photo for a flyer for their upcoming show, or simply swapping in a photo of their website link. That’s insane and ridiculous, and why would that work, anyway? No one’s going to go through your online dating profile, see that your band is playing tonight and think, “This is my chance!” It’s tacky and annoying, and will actually make people hate your band/stand-up/DJ set/anything.

3. “Ghosting” on the conversation.

This one is beyond annoying. You see someone you like, you reach out, they reach out back, and then…nothing. Now ladies, with Tinder (or really any dating site/app), you don’t have to wait for them to contact you — that’s not what I’m saying here. I’m saying it’s really annoying once you make contact and then the other person just disappears.

For example, on Tinder, don’t “like” someone unless you’re fully prepared to interact with them. On any dating site, if you reach out, be prepared to have a conversation. Of course, if they say something horribly offensive or if you find that you just don’t like, that’s okay, and that’s your right. But don’t start a convo with someone you “liked” and then just abandon them, especially if you’ve barely conversed. “Ghosting” is one of the most annoying things anyone can ever do, and it’s especially annoying when it happens before you’ve even gotten the chance to date!

What are your Tinder/online dating pet peeves? What do you wish people would stop doing?

 

Photo via We Heart It.

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Almie Rose is the blogger behind the insanely popular website Apocalypstick.com. She shares her personal (and sometimes harrowing) experiences dating in Los Angeles.

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