When you’re setting up your online dating profile for the first time, it can be tempting to stray into the world of clichés when you don’t know what to say to describe yourself. But by doing this, you could be shooting yourself in the foot by turning potential dates off – without even realising what you’ve said and where you’ve gone wrong. Follow our top tips to avoid your profile reading like the ultimate dating cliché.
“I’m new to this / I’ve never done this before”
If you protest your innocence too much when it comes to using online dating, then you’ll come across as if you don’t really want to be there. What’s more, if you’re embarrassed to be there, what reason has someone got to approach you? Betraying your discomfort shows that you think there’s still a stigma to online dating which in turn makes potential suitors wary of talking to you. It’s a lose-lose situation. Likewise goes for the phrase “we can lie about where we met”, which also has the bonus of making you appear dishonest and up for lying!
Top tip: Be aware of voicing a negative opinion towards online dating in your profile, accidentally or not.
“I like going out but I’m just as happy at home”
You might think that this statement shows that you’re a happy go lucky, confident kind of person that’s open to new experiences but also enjoys the simpler things in life, but think about it: who doesn’t like going out but also staying in? What does that really mean? Nothing, it means you like existing. By covering too many bases, you essentially cover none of them and you cancel out the things you actually like.
Top tip: Be specific about your interests, the ones that make you who you are.
“My friends say that I’m…”
By getting your friends to describe you, it may show that you’re not confident enough in yourself and your friends are only ever going to be complimentary anyway, so it’s not really an honest way to get a portrayal of yourself. What’s more, empty adjectives such as ‘funny’, ‘kind’, ‘thoughtful’ or ‘trustworthy’ are just that: empty. Who would describe themselves as dull, mean, selfish and untrustworthy on their dating profile?
Top tip: Dare to describe yourself or, if you do ask your friends for advice, don’t just directly copy what they say but incorporate it into your own description.
“I like travelling/reading/swimming/seeing my friends”
Although it can be tempting to go for the easy option, listing generic interests will not make you stand out from the crowd. If you really do absolutely love reading, try listing your favourite authors or genre of books instead of just claiming to like ‘reading’. Imagine that your date needs to remember something about you before meeting for the first time, do you want it to be ‘ah that was the girl that liked seeing her friends at the weekend’.
Top tip: As with earlier, try and be as specific as possible and remember that you’re trying to make the wonderfully individual nature of your personality stand out.
“I like having fun / I’m easy going”
As with the empty adjectives, no one is going to describe themselves are someone who doesn’t enjoy having fun or someone that is extremely hard work and high maintenance. This also goes for other meaningless clichés such as “I see the good side in every situation” or “I’m an upbeat, glass half full kind of guy”.
Top tip: Give an example of the kinds of things you like to do that make you fun. Almost everyone would describe themselves as ‘fun’ but not everyone would have the same definition of what that means – show them!